HelenKay Dimon

Jason Mulgrew.  Yeah, I hadn’t heard of him either until about 24 hours ago.  His blog about his dating life gets something like 10,000 hits a day.  People magazine named him one of the "Guys On The Rise" – their title, not mine.  Let’s just say, it sounds as if everyone is familiar with young Jason but me.  So, I checked out his blog, Everything Is Wrong With Me, with morbid curiosity.  Jason is 25, lives in NYC and actually has a full-time job unrelated to blogging.  I know all that because I read it on his site.  He also lists 14 things to know about him.  Here are a few – and I think you’ll agree this guy is hero material:

5) My roommate Brian is a terrible human being who I will betray at the first chance I get. We are basically the same person, although he is in much better shape than I am, despite smoking around 150 cigarettes a day.

6) I haven’t slept with a woman in so long that I checked the rule book and I’m technically a virgin again.

7) I am from a blue-collar Irish Catholic family from Philly, complete with a chain-smoking tattooed dad, a short gregarious mother, a younger brother that despises me and a younger sister who’s pretty sure I’m gay.

Though raised (semi-)religious, God and I haven’t spoken to each other since an incident in Phoenix in 1994 (don’t ask) and we are currently trying to destroy each other. He is winning. For now.

10) I graduated from Boston College in 2001.  During my tenure there, I was thrown out of housing twice, sued once, and fined around $30,000 in damages. I graduated from St. Joe’s Prep in Philly in 1997. Girls did not like me in high school.

11) I am the worst hypochondriac in the world, because though I think I’m going to have a heart attack or stroke every time I masturbate or stand up quickly, I think nothing of having forty alcoholic drinks, smoking a fat bowl, and then throwing up blood.

Now, to my knowledge Jason doesn’t have a book deal yet but I’m guessing it’s only a matter of time.

My early attempts at writing romance were, let’s just say, not good.  I’d use the word horrendous but, really, that’s just not strong enough to convey utter lack of craft, coherence, characterization, or any other "c" word you can think of (well, most other "c" words).  At this complete lack of talent stage I joined a critique group.  Again, I had no idea what I was doing and inflicted gave my work to these innocent folks to read.  My tenure did not last long and it took more than 3 years before I could work up the nerve to inflict give my work to someone else.  Now, Wendy is the person punished.  Previously Jamie Sobrato held that honor.

Jamie is a double RWA Golden Heart finalist, a past RITA nominee and a multi-published writer with Harlequin Temptation and Blaze.  She’s also very talented,  too cute to be real (as you can see from the photo on her site), charming and a mother to 2 young kids.  She started a blog a few months ago called The Naked Page.  In her June 16th entry, titled Performance Anxiety, she comments on something we all think about – the idea of having people she knows actually read her blog:

In the past few days, at least three people who are not my critique partner have commented to me that they have been reading my blog and think it’s funny. These are people that I actually know (you know who you are)–not cyber-strangers of any sort.

My reaction: What? People are actually reading this thing?! People I know?!

My fear: Now I’ll never be able to be funny again. Every entry from now on will be like the torturous annual composition of the holiday family newsletter. Me trying oh-so-hard to be funny and entertaining while simultaneously trying not to offend or confuse my husband’s colleagues, my Great Aunt Margaret, my Granny, or any of the other 75 people on our mailing list.

Who hasn’t had a relative or person you knew in high school stumble across your site and shock you with an email? So, let’s clear up a few things.  First, if you knew me before I turned 30, I’m sorry. Second, if we are related – and, yeah, Paul this means you – don’t tell my mom about this because she thinks I’m too busy balancing my day job and writing to call her every day (or is it every hour).  If she finds out I have time to blog (to the extent she even knows what a blog is), my life will be a guilt-infested hell.  You know what I’m saying…. 

One of the very cool perks of working with Kensington Brava is that I can get my greedy little paws on copies of upcoming releases before they hit the bookstore, and I am all about being first.  And, yeah, one more month and I make a play for Erin McCarthy’s October releases – all 11 of them.

Actually, the cool mail package landed on my doorstep (likely ticking off our weirdo neighbors – honestly, they are deranged by any objective standard) as a result of a deadline conversation.  Or, to be more accurate, Madame Editor’s desire to get me off the phone.  I’m convinced she turned the subject of our chit chat to other people’s books so that she didn’t have to hear me whine.  Good call on her part.

These titles show how Brava continues to branch out.  There is a general perception out there (somewhere) that Brava – think about the novellas here – is all about light fun stuff.  This bunch is a bit more eclectic, with vampires, suspense and light fun stuff.  So, here’s some of what’s coming to a bookstore near you in the next few months:

1. Really Unusual Bad Boys  by MaryJanice Davidson -The title and bright green cover should attract attention.  The lead-in blurb says: MaryJanice Davidson creates a trio of outrageously passionate stories that take bliss to new, albeit unusual, heights as she tells the stories of three women and a trio of princely brothers. I see the words "a magically delicious naked man…" on the back cover so I’m thinking that’s the explanation for the word "unusual" in the title.
2. Ready by Lucy Monroe – Looks like the first in a series.  Generally described as:  They’re good guys fighting the bad guys.  They’ll get the job done – if the price is right and so is the cause.  Meet three sexy men who individually are READY, WILLING and ABLE to go the distance – and together are unstoppable…
3. Fangs For The Memories  by Kathy Love – This is an uncorrected proof without a cover or cover blurb, but I’m thinking vampire story with a funny edge.  That would fit with Love’s writing style, which is endearing. 
4. Naked Truth by Amy Fetzer – Fetzer is a military wife and writes about military folks.  This is a suspense with a former marine, blackmail and the jungles of Columbia.  I’m in.
5. Not Just For Tonight by Susan Johnson, Katherine O’Neal and Diane Whiteside – Hot historical novellas.  Brava puts out far more contemporaries so it will be interesting to see this work. 

Now, if only I could finish The English Patient…

Every year around this time a magazine  – or ten – provides its readership with the books to read this Summer.  In an effort to prove that I read something other than Entertainment Weekly, although not often, I decided to print the list provided by another fine entertainment magazine – Time.  The article aptly titled 5 Fantastic First Novels sets out, umm, 5 fantastic first novels, or so Lev Grossman of Time thinks. The list goes like this:

1. In The Shadow Of The Law by Kermit Roosevelt – Let’s forget this poor bugger’s unfortunate first name for a second and concentrate on the work.  This is a legal thriller.  Lev says: "There are suspenseful, devious plots aplenty…"  Not often does one see the word "aplenty" these days so that sounds interesting.  Lev goes on to say: "…Roosevelt (a descendant of Theodore and a former Supreme Court clerk) writes about the law more passionately and entertainingly than anyone since Scott Turow."  See, now, Lev had me hooked right up until the part about Scott Turow.  Turow’s last few books have been as interesting as watching toenails grow so now I’m thinking Lev has lost his way.
2. Fashion Victim by Sam Baker – Sam is actually a she – a fact I can confirm having seen the photo accompanying the article.  Definitely female.  She is also an editor of Britain’s Cosmopolitan which, of course, means Lev feels compelled to mix in a little demeaning attitude with his cheeky comments.  For example when describing Baker: "…she knows whereof she writes – and she actually writes well."  Followed by my favorite line:  "By the end of Fashion Victim, you may even believe that models have feelings."  I’m sure that has a lot to do with the plot about a serious investigative journalist working at a women’s magazine in the middle of a whodunit. Lev, Lev, Lev…
3. The Twins Of Tribeca by Rachel Pine – Pine worked at Miramax at one time.  This "thinly veiled" book is about a woman working for a fictional movie studio.  I’m sure that’s only a coincidence.  The nicest thing Lev has to say on this one is: "The plot is gossamer thin, but the dirt is deep, dark and delicious."  Almost makes you wonder if Lev forgot the title of this article when he picked this one, huh?
4. The Traveler by John Twelve Hawks – Another strange name but at least this one is hidden in the middle.  Okay, I have to admit that I’ve read the description of this book 4 times and still have no idea what this is about.  None.  The ending quote in the blurb says:  "Of course, this is all completely nuts – but it’s also the stuff that first-rate high-tech paranoid-schizophrenic thrillers are made of."  Well, that cleared it right up.  Thanks, Lev.
5. The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova – Finally, a book I’ve actually heard of – good job, Lev.  This is a story about an academic investigating and uncovering the original Dracula.  It’s described as: "a smart, bibliographic mystery in the same vein (sorry) as A.S. Byatt’s Possession - but without all that poetry."  I liked Possession but generally hate anything vampire-oriented so I’m skeptical.

Strange but Lev didn’t mention my book.  I figure he’s limited to current releases and will come calling in the Spring.  Right, Lev?

Okay, it’s going to take a few minutes to get around to my point.  This sounds as  if it’s about music.  It’s not.  It’s about writing.  Stick with me.

So, I’m not a country music fan.  In general, it’s just not my thing.  The only person less country music oriented would be the hubby.  He has the music taste of a 18 year old boy or, maybe, a 14 year old girl.  One of those. Despite all that, while trying to avoid the endless parade of re-runs last evening (and a looming deadline), we ventured over to our much-neglected Tivo list. The not-yet-viewed choices came down to Empire Falls (which I’m waiting to watch until after I read the book), the movie The English Patient (which I have successfully avoided for months) and something called CMT Crossroads.  This is a show where a country music star/band and a former big-time rock star/band are put on stage together. 

This episode – the only episode we have and I don’t know why we even have this one – was Pat Benatar and Martina McBride.  Let’s stop for a second to discuss just how cool Benatar is and how amazing she looks.  She looks exactly the same as she did 20 years ago.  Actually, she looks better.  The woman is somewhere near 55 years old and still has the power to make my hubby say:  damn, she’s hot.  And, he wasn’t wrong.

Now to the point – I promised I’d get there eventually.  They sang some of McBride’s songs (I only knew one) and some of Benatar’s oldies.  Benatar’s husband, guitarist Neil Giraldo, took the stage with the women and they did an amazing version of Benatar’s We Belong.   The rendition knocked the audience silent.  There wasn’t any chit chat in my living room either.  Certainly, the song was well-done but, for me, there was something else going on up there on the stage.  The way Benatar looked at Giraldo, so intimate and loving, while he sang with McBride, well, it was nothing short of breathtaking.  My thought was:  wow, she still looks at him like that after all these years. 

My next thought was:  how do we capture that feeling, that sense of forever, in romance writing.  We can see the special bond when people in love look at each other.  We can hear it when a singer injects emotion into a song.  In fact, that might be the difference between a good singer and a great singer – that ability make people feel something deep and profound.  Writing is a bigger challenge.  We can’t depend on the gazes, the beat or the actual voice.  It has to come from somewhere else.  From the way the words string together and the internal beat the reader hears in those words.  It’s a skill  – knowing how to create a character and picking exactly the right word to use at exactly the right time.  The easy answer is that this is all part of craft and is learned over time.  But I do wonder if, like with singing, there will always be people for whom this special gift comes naturally while the rest of us are left to study and practice to reach a level of proficiency but never quite get to the same place.

In follow-up to yesterday’s post – how many releases in a month are too many from one author?It would seem the answer is: one at a time, thank you.  Maybe not.

It’s no surprise to anyone who stops by now and then that Erin McCarthy is one of my favorite authors.  The fact we’re going to be in an anthology together is a bonus for me (probably not for her) but my fangirl appreciation existed long before I got The Call.  I own all of her books and have read all but A Date With The Other Side – that’s a result of my anti-paranormal issue, not her writing.   

While combing through McCarthy’s website, I noticed she has 3 more releases coming out this year:  the Brave single title, The Pregnancy Test; a novella in the Brava anthology, The Night Before Christmas;  and a novella in the Berkley anthology, The Naked Truth.  The interesting part – to the extent I haven’t lost you yet – is that all 3 books come out in October 2005.   The same thing happened with Alison Kent, another one of my favorites, this month.  She had a Brava single title, Larger Than Life,  and a novella in the Brava anthology, Beach Blanket Bad Boys released.

I wonder, as either an author or a reader, if this matters.  Seems to me the concern about readers only having so much money to spend and choosing not to spend it all on one author that month is a real concern.  Now, as a reader I’m one of those folks who gets attached to an author then buys all of that person’s releases.  If more than one comes out in the month, that isn’t likely to dissuade me.  After all, I have both of Alison’s June releases.  But 3 in a month could be a problem for some folks.  For example, if A Date With The other Side were one of the 3 McCarthy releases coming out in October, it’s conceivable – just maybe – that I would lose a bit of my usual loyalty, buy her other 2 monthly releases and hold off on the one from the genre I didn’t like.  Sure, I’d buy it eventually, but maybe not right then.  I do have a mortgage and other bills to pay.

If it’s not a great promotional tool, how does this happen?  I’m not sure.  In McCarthy’s case, there are two publishers releasing her work in October.  And, maybe I’m wrong and this works exactly the opposite of how I think it does and publishers prefer multiple releases from one author in a month, but I doubt it.  With many things in life more is better (I’m referring, of course, to potato chips) , but I’m guessing this is one of those times when it’s not.

Entertainment Weekly has an article – more like a graph and a blurb, really – comparing the yearly output of 5 famous, but very different, writers.  It’s called Title Fight: Who’s More Prolific?  And, yes, I read this stupid magazine every week.  And, yes, Nora Roberts is listed in this thing. The general point of the blurb is that Alexander McCall Smith, author of the No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency books published his first book in 2002 and now, basically, publishes a book every month.  To be fair, that’s my math calculation, not that of the EW editors.  The breakdown is based on books published in the 2002-2005 time period and goes like this:

1. Nora Roberts is the winner with 23.  Now, I’m thinking this is a bit skewed since 23 must include some of her re-releases…uh, right?  She really hasn’t written, on average, something like 6 new books a year.  On second thought, maybe she has.
2. Joyce Carol Oates is next with 16.  Okay, I admit this one was a surprise.  The last book I read by her was I Am No One You Know,  which is a short story collection and I have no idea how it found its way into my house.  I don’t remember buying it.  Good news is that I don’t remember stealing it either.  Apparently she’s been very busy since that release and continues to pump out book after book.  She’s also won a bunch of awards so I guess she’s doing something right.  Whatever it is, it works for her.
3. We have a tie at 3rd between Alexander McCall Smith and James Patterson with 15.  I give the edge to McCall Smith since he is actually only one person.  Patterson appears to be made up of more than one writer – none of whom are particularly good, in my view.  He has whored franchised his name or something ’cause now some of his book covers have multiple author names on them.  This is a strange phenomenum that requires its own blog, so I’ll just move on.
4. Danielle Steel brings up the rear (yes, there is a joke in there somewhere) with 12.  Honestly, I think that’s 11 3/4 too many for Steel.  I’ve never understood her appeal.  The last book of hers I read had a robot in it (see:  The Klone and I) and, well, that was the end for me.  It was also the last time I visited my parents’ house and forgot to bring at least one book along.  In fact, it’s quite possible that was the last time I visited my parents’ house… 

What does this mean for book publishing – no idea.  Just thought the blurb was interesting.  Use the information however you see fit.

One day a week or so ago Wendy and I were talking.  Actually, we were complaining about the limited number of sites that review romance novels.  Sure, there are some and some of those are great (See:  Smart Bitches, some of the links on my sidebar links and some of the links off RTB) but, really, there just aren’t that many.  We decided that was a bad thing.  Rather than continue to complain – although we do love complaining – we decided to step out and try something new.  To set up a review site.  A place we could go to talk about the romance novels everyone is reading, some that are more obscure, new releases and some old favorites. 

Now, this is risky.  The general mood in the romance community seems to be that it is wrong to even hint that there may be an imperfect romance novel out there somewhere.  The thought process is:  if we admit some books aren’t as great as others we’ll never get respect as a genre.  Wrong, wrong, wrong.  This mindset does romance readers and writers a disservice.  We’re smarter than this.  We can take it.  And, frankly, if we aren’t willing to open up and seek honest critiques of our work, we may as well just forget the publishing and start printing free stories on our blogs instead. 

With that in mind, we’ve started Paperback Reader.  We’ll review romance novels of all subgenres and in all formats, and see how it goes.  First up is Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie, which was perfect because I’d been looking for a reason to dig it out of my TBR pile.

Please stop by.

I live in the D.C. suburbs.  The entire area is rich with politicos, lawyers, useless wealthy people, lawyers, lobbyists, students, more lawyers and a few writers.  Some of the writers are of the uptight variety (except my friend Tim – he’s an uptight lawyer, sure, but he gave me the most impressive bouquet of flowers I’ve ever seen when I got married so I’ll always stick up for him).  Every now and then someone exciting rolls into town and, well, rolls around in everyone’s sheets then has the class to roll and tell.  The most recent addition to this category is Jessica Cutler, the writer (and I hate to use that word here) of The Washingtonienne, based on her exploits while sleeping her way around Capitol Hill – give that woman a book deal!

But, according to an article in USA Today, Cutler is the only one in town who is having any fun.  The premise of the article is that no one writes romance using D.C. as the backdrop because no one thinks of D.C. as a romantic town.  At least, I think that’s the point.  Hard to Tell.  Now, I know what you’re thinking – this is the typical anti-romance story without any in-the-know sources.  Not this time.  See, RWA President Tara Taylor Quinn, who lives in Phoenix (which is not anywhere near D.C., in case you lost that U.S. map you got in 5th grade), is quoted.  She starts out okay:

Tara Taylor Quinn, president of Romance Writers of America (and no relation to Sally), says she wouldn’t dare set a story in official Washington.

"I would find it intimidating," says the Phoenix-based author of 37 books. "There’s so much that goes on that you can’t see. People want the grit; they want it all. I can’t give it to them; I’m not there."

Furthermore, says Taylor Quinn, if you have a story already formed in your head, it’s hard to set it in Washington. With a capital backdrop, she says, it would have to be driven by the numerous "automatic elements" that come with the territory — politicians, lobbyists, interns, corruption, partisanship.

Then, her romance promo skills falter a bit.  Okay, a lot.  The story ends with a less than stellar quote by Quinn:

That’s not to say you can’t find authors of women’s fiction around here. In fact, more than 240 people belong to Washington Romance Writers. But two-thirds of them are unpublished. And Taylor Quinn offers a possible reason why: "Maybe it’s because they’re trying to set books in Washington, D.C."

One might think this is not a wise thing for the RWA President to say since her job is to represent unpublished writers as well as published ones.  Guess we know why Quinn isn’t in politics.  To be fair, Quinn sent a letter to WRW (Washington Romance Writers) where she insists she didn’t say the last quote and that what she did say was taken out of context.  I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt.  But, after all the RWA missteps and mess ups of the last few months, my advice to Quinn would be to think about taking an old-fashioned Time Out.  You know, practicing a little quiet time and resting an extra second or two before she speaks.

Did my usual walk through the B&N Daily Top Ten for contemporary romance yesterday.  The list didn’t really change much over the last 6 days.  Either people have stopped buying romance or the same 10 books are purchased everyday by a rotating crop of folks visiting B&N.  The second possibility is more frightening than the first. 

Not only has the list not changed much over the last few days, the list of authors doesn’t change that much as you read through numbers 1-10.  Out of the Daily Top Ten, 5 titles are by Nora Roberts – let’s all stop and ponder just how much money this woman has for a second, shall we -  and 2 are by Nicholas Sparks.  I refuse to spend any time pondering Sparks.

The list and my thoughts on the same:

1. Black Rose by Nora Roberts – I’m just going to go ahead and say what I really think….by all that is good  and just on this Earth buy a book by someone else!  Damn, people, there are other romance authors out there.  Some might even suggest that there are better authors out there (not me, others and you know who you are).  There is no rule that says: thou shalt buy all Nora Roberts’ books.  Whether the trilogy is about flowers, boats or all things Ireland, it is time to move one.  Buy her if you must but buy someone else too.
2. Two Of A Kind by Nora Roberts – See #1.  And, while you’re out there not buying Nora Roberts’ new stuff, also consider not buying her entire freaking backlist. 
3. True Believer by Nicholas Sparks – I could drone on about the holy war fought in my household over the movie The Notebook but let’s skip all that and say if you read Sparks, you likely read James Patterson’s romances and, really, I don’t know how to help you.
4. Blue Dahlia by Nora Roberts – See, by this point I’m tired of typing her name.  You should be tired of reading her stuff. 
5. Rules Of Play by Nora Roberts – What’s left to say?  How ’bout, this is a reprint and re-package of 2 books from the 80s.  I swear that one of the books in this set, Opposites Attract, has been in 3 or 4 other Roberts’ reprints already released this month.  Either that or she’s had numerous books with this title over her career, which is possible.  If you’ve written as many as she has you’re bound to circle around and reuse titles by accident.  Silhouette likely is too busy making money off her to notice they keep reprinting the same book.
6. Guardian by Nicholas Sparks – One Sparks’ book on the list is a annoying.  Two is a travesty.  No wonder people don’t take the romance genre seriously.
7. Before Sunrise by Diana Palmer – Palmer and I go way back.  The whole hardcover thing she’s got going on is not making me happy.  But, we have a relationship, a commitment of sorts, so I’ll buy this.  For reasons unknown I can’t stop buying Palmer.  It’s one of those things I need a 12-step plan to overcome.
8. The Nosy Neighbor by Fern Michaels – This is the dumbest romance book title ever.  There should be a top ten list for that.  It’s like a title for a 1950s tv show.  And, it’s described as a paranormal suspense thriller.  How you would ever know that from the stupid title is unclear but, yuck.  I don’t see me plunking down $7.99.  Sorry.
9. Oceans Of Fire by Christine Feehan -  Confession time.  People say this woman is brilliant, and I’m sure she is, but I don’t even find the cover blurbs of her books interesting.  This one is something about a magical place with magical sisters….zzzzzzzzzz.    It sounds awful but what the hell do I know.  It’s #9 so someone out there wants all things magical.
10. The Perfect Neighbor by Nora Roberts – Reality check:  this book has a January 2002 release date. Are we really at the point where current Nora Roberts’ books are not enough and we have to reach back more than 3 years to find stuff of hers to buy each week?  I can only assume one person bought 459 copies of this book yesterday to see if he/she could push it into the Daily Top Ten as a joke.  Either that or people think it’s the prequel to Fern Michael’s Nosy Neighbor book at #8 and want to see where the story began.  Either way, we need a new B&N rule that only books released within the last 12 months can find their way into the Daily Top Ten.  That I even have to make up a rule like that pisses me off.

Will I buy any of these books?  You likely don’t care but I’ll share anyway.  The Palmer, yes, due to our bond but, ummm, that’s it.  Apparently the books I read are numbers 11-103.