HelenKay Dimon

Never been a big Halloween fan. Blame my mother. She turned the house into an amazing showcase for Christmas. For Halloween she grumbled until the day passed. So, I offer a little something for those who dislike Halloween and for those who enjoy it.

For the anti-Halloween crowd: look at these books deals. “Significant” means the author got in the $251,000-$499,000 range. “Major” means $500,000 and up. Uh-huh, that’s big money.

FICTION: WOMEN’S/ROMANCE
Linda Lael Miller’s next few novels, to Dianne Moggy at Harlequin, in a major deal, by Irene Goodman at Irene Goodman Agency (world).

FICTION: WOMEN’S/ROMANCE
NYT bestselling author Carly Phillips three more novels, to Dianne Moggy at HQN, in a significant deal, by Robert Gottlieb of the Trident Media Group.

FICTION: WOMEN’S/ROMANCE
NYT bestselling author Mary B. Morrison’s three untitled novels of erotica, to be written under the pseudonym Honey B., to Karen Thomas at Warner, in a significant deal, by Andrew Stuart at The Stuart Agency (World).

For the pro-Halloween crowd: while I’ve heard that cartoon covers are on the outs, I do like these for Annette Blair. Think they’re cute and flirty. Having read the first two (the third comes out in December ‘06), I can say the covers convey the mood of the stories. The covers are a good match to the author’s style.

A few years ago in a feature in The Oxford Student an unknown author described her addiction to romance novels. She (I’m guessing the writer was a she) described the standard plot of every romance like this:

I know the plot even before I open the book: a couple meets and are instantly attracted to each other. It might at first be lust combined with a certain derision that quickly manifests itself in the first physical contact, and by the time they finally shag, they have fallen in love with each other but won’t admit it. They then undergo some kind of crisis moment because they are scared to be in love, which is followed by a brief separation before the person who doubted wises up and finally asks for them back. If the person who instigated the doubt is the male partner, he produces a ring and they live happily ever after.

Fair? Is there more to it than that? Is the formula that simple? Is the only “thing” distinguishing one book from another the execution of this standard theme?

With DC, Maryland and Virginia being so close and all, and with people working in one and living in the other, the news of one jurisdiction also becomes the news of the other. At election time, it can be downright annoying. The campaign commercials and ads for Maryland’s races are tiring and stupid. Virginia, however, has far outdone Maryland. The ads for the Virginia Senatorial race between George Allen (Rep and the incumbent) and James Webb (Dem) are enough to make you return the television to Best Buy and stop newspaper service.

Let me first say – I think Allen and Webb are both idiots. Big, big idiots. Allen, however, wins the clueless simpleton award. He’s a member of the Senate and, apparently, has no clue what the word “fiction” means. If you somehow missed this story, here’s the brief version: Webb wrote a bunch of novels, most about wartime. Some based on his experience with the titles like, Lost Soldiers, Something to Die For and Fields of Fire. Definite war stories. Allen, the genius, took excerpts from Webb’s fiction and tried to get a bunch of newspapers to run the excerpts in an attempt to show that Webb writes graphic scenes and says demeaning things about women, etc. The newspapers didn’t go with the story. Drudge did.

Allen’s campaign manager Kay James says this: “How can women trust Jim Webb to represent their views in the Senate when chauvinistic attitudes and sexually exploitative references run throughout his fiction and nonfiction writings?”

Kay, have you ever read a book? Ideas, imagination – any of these concepts mean anything to you? Kay, how does one write about Vietnam War experiences and have everything sound sunny and rosy? Not exactly a pretty time. And, Kay, did you miss the part where Allen supporter and fellow Republican vet John McCain praised Webb’s books?

Allen said this:

“My record as a United States senator is an open book. My opponent has a record as well,” Allen told reporters. “He, in his advertisements, points out that he’s an author, that he’s a writer of books. That’s part of his record. These passages in his books are part of his open record. I’ll let the people of Virginia be the judge as to whose record they are more comfortable with.”

They’re books, you moron.

Forget the issues. Forget Allen’s racial slur a few weeks ago. Forget that Allen’s sister wrote a book describing Allen as a nasty piece of goods. Let’s start making decisions about who authors are as people based on the fiction they write. I’m assuming that means James Patterson will be arrested later this afternoon. After all, women tend to die in vicious ways in his books. That can only mean he’s pro-woman killing, right?

The folks who run Washington Post Book World aren’t exactly known for their love of popular fiction. In general, “those” sorts of books get in the way of all the space needed for and devoted to nonfiction works and political ramblings packaged as novels. But, for those reading along over the last few weeks, something kind of funny happened. A few weeks ago Jonathan Yardley knocked literary wonder Charles Frazier’s newest Thirteen Moons, and this weekend Ron Charles praised Stephen King’s Lisey’s Story.

What is happening in the world???

First, I have to admit that I read Frazier’s first book Cold Mountain and was somewhat stunned that people stayed awake long enough to get to the end. I thought maybe the novel received all sorts of awards and bestseller titles because that was easier than actually reading the entire thing. When I found out Cold Mountain was going to be a movie, I knew I had somehow lost touch with what those running the studios in Hollywood found entertaining. When I saw the movie – in my home via Netflix where I promptly napped through the middle…possibly almost until the end – I realized Cold Mountain just wasn’t for me. So I sort of chuckled and nodded my head when Yardley talked about Frazier’s Thirteen Moons and said: “Reading Frazier is like sitting by the cracker barrel for hour after hour and listening to an amiable but impossibly gassy guy who talks real slow, says “I reckon” a whole lot and never shuts up.” Happy to know I’m not alone.

In contrast to Frazier’s review, there’s the review of Lisey’s Story. This one comes pretty close to being what one might call glowing. The review ends like this:

But what works beautifully throughout Lisey’s Story is the rich portrait of a marriage and the complicated affection that outlives death. Who would have thought that a man who’s spent the last 30 years scaring the hell out of us would produce a novel about the kind of love that carries us through grief?

King’s review is front page of Sunday’s Book World. The reviewer immediately references King’s lifetime achievement award from the National Book Foundation and the the brouhaha that ensued thereafter – ie, why give a hack such a prestigious award. He then goes on to suggest that King has earned the right to sit with the grown-ups at the literary table:

With Lisey’s Story, King has crashed the exclusive party of literary fiction, and he’ll be no easier to ignore than Carrie at the prom. His new novel is an audacious meditation on the creative process and a remarkable intersection of the different strains of his talent: the sensitivity of his autobiographical essays, the insight of his critical commentary, the suspense of his short stories and the psychological terror of his novels. (And yes, a few hairy monsters.)

So, according to the Book World reviewers:

Charles Frazier = boring and dull
Stephen King = insightful and smart

How can you not get a little chuckle out of that?

I’m over at the Brava Author blog today – come visit.

For those wanting some action here: my July ‘07 single title release Your Mouth Drives Me Crazy is on preorder at Amazon. Here’s the awesome cover (for some reason the thumbnail feature isn’t working, so I can’t make it bigger…will work on that):

The cover copy goes like this:

Her mouth should be a dangerous weapon. So should his—but for different reasons. Thrown together by chance—and a pair of handcuffs—they’re about to make Hawaii even steamier…

NEVER LET ME GO

Annie Parks came to Hawaii to gather information and settle a score, not spend time handcuffed to a sexy stranger’s bed. Okay, so this particular stranger saved her from drowning after she was pitched overboard by some goons. And he’s about six feet of hard, Hawaiian muscle and gorgeous cool that’s making forgotten parts of her say, “A-lo-ha!” She needs to stay focused, but a side dish of Kane Travers is awfully tempting.

Kauai Police Chief Kane Travers is not a vacation kind of guy. So it figures that when Internal Affairs suspended him, he’d end up rescuing a sarcastic, dishonest, extremely hot redhead who is clearly hiding something. Amnesia? Yeah, right. Kane’s got half a mind to give Miss Whoever She Is something she’ll never forget. His cop senses tell him that the lady’s in deep and needs his protection. But how can he get her to tell him anything when all he wants is to take her home and do everything?

Go forth and order with abandon.

Some people are just cool. This time I’m talking about Linda Lael Miller. I’ve said before that she’s one of the first romance authors I ever read. So, if you don’t like my books – blame her. She, along with Jayne Ann Krentz and Julie Garwood, started me down this romance writing road.

From her impressive sales, I’m clearly not Miller’s only reader. As a NYT bestseller, she makes really good money writing books. Not bad work if you can get it. She appears to recognize her good fortune. She uses the money she earns from speaking engagements to fund scholarships called Linda Lael Miller Scholarships for Women.

From her website:

One of the things that make me tick is helping women who are struggling to better their lot in life. That’s why several years ago I established my Linda Lael Miller Scholarships for Women. Each year I award several scholarships to brave women who desperately need a financial leg up, in order to get ahead. Unlike traditional scholarships, my stipends can be used for any accredited institution, from beauty school to college. The money can be used not only for tuition and books, but also for childcare, transportation, whatever it is that the women need in order to attend school. Here on my website you can read about past scholarship winners.

Classy lady.

Actors seem to produce actors. Writers appear to produce writers. Some examples: Anne Rice’s son Christopher Rice has published three novels and has more on the way; Elizabeth Lowell’s daughter Heather Lowell is following in mom’s footsteps; and, Jesse Kellerman’s carrer choice may have been set by biology since both mom and dad are successful authors (Jonathan and Faye Kellerman).

Now Joe Hill, aka Joseph Hillstrom King, award-winning short story writer and son of authors Tabitha and Stephen King, is making some noise. Hill’s first novel Heart-Shaped Box comes out in February 2007. According to USA Today, Publisher William Morrow calls it the “Publishing Event of the Year” on advance review copies sent to reviewers recently. Warner Brothers bought the movie rights apparently without knowing Hill’s parentage.

Not bad for a first novel.

In case you care, the back cover blurb goes like this:

Rock star Judas Coyne is a collector of the bizarre and the grotesque. He has a used hangman’s noose, a cookbook for cannibals, a snuff movie. So naturally when he learns there’s a ghost for sale on the internet, Jude doesn’t think twice. Some impulses require no consideration.

If ever there was a case of caveat emptor, this is it. . . .

In light of all of this, I’ve decided to blame my parents if I don’t become a NYT bestselling author at some point. If I work this right I’ll never have to take any personal responsibility if my career stalls. Blame mom and dad. It was their job to be award-winning authors and pass that talent on to me, so I could pass it on to my kids and so on…

Zane she’s a NYT bestselling author, founder of the publishing house Strebor Books International (distributed by Simon and Schuster), editor and publisher, successful businesswoman, winner of the NAACP 2006 Image Award for Outstanding Fiction, a huge voice and force in erotica…and only 40 years old. That past part makes my head spin. Her book Addicted is being made into a movie and will be out in May 2007.

Before the erotic romance craze hit with all of these new publishing lines and imprints, I’d heard of Zane. Hadn’t read her books because erotica was a bit off my radar screen but knew about her. She lives in the DC metro area and has been spotlighted in the Washington Post, most recently in September in an article about her take on “speed dating” which she calls “freak dating” – check out the article here.

Either I’m more aware of her now or bookstores are because her titles seem to be all over the trade paperback tables at B&N all of a sudden. Maybe they always were and I missed them. Maybe they were hidden in the AA section before and with the erotica craze have taken a spot at the front of the store. Don’t know. I have a theory that has to do with AA literature not being taken seriously, but…

Here are a few covers:

Anyone read her? Is she romance oriented or pure erotica? If you read erotica and haven’t tried her, why not (not judging – just wondering)? I haven’t read much erotica, in part because the way the publishers package and market it lately turns me off, but can anyone recommend a title if I wanted to try one?

I know I mention Stephen King quite often. I admit to being somewhat obsessed with his career. Like his work or not, you must admit the guy makes an impression. It’s been years since I’ve read fiction from King. Have read On Writing a few times. Read his articles in Entertainment Weekly. Always take a second to read a magazine or newspaper article if I see his named mentioned. So, when I noticed a reference to his newest release Lisey’s Story in EW, I checked it out. Looks as if it’s time to pick up King’s fiction again.

EW said:

The novel, which stars the titular Lisey – widow of a King-esque blockbuster author – is a story about marriage and fidelity, the dark places writers go to find their material, and the even darker people who stalk writers. “It’s also a love story, and I’ve never tried that before,” King says. “I saw a chance to touch an audience that normally stays away from my books.”

Evidence of this one being a bit difference comes in the form of a quote from Nicholas Sparks – yes, that Nicholas Sparks – the guy who wrote The Notebook and not a guy I imagine hangs out with Stephen King:

Lisey’s Story is a wondrous novel of marriage, a love story steeped in strength and tenderness, and cast with the most vivid, touching and believable characters in recent literature. I came to adore Lisey Landon and her sisters, I ached for Scott and all he’d been through, and when I finally reached the bittersweet and heartfelt conclusion, my first thought was that I wanted to start over again from the beginning, for it felt as if were saying good-bye to old friends. This is Stephen King at his finest and most generous, a dazzling novel that you’ll thank yourself for reading long after the final page is turned.

Of Lisey’s Story, Kirkus Reviews says:

The widow of a bestselling novelist reveals that the wellspring for his ideas is a very dark place, indeed. First and last, this is a powerful love story-and love causes people to do strange and remarkable things. It has been two years since legendary novelist Scott Landon died. His widow, Lisey, has finally summoned the strength to begin clearing and cataloguing his workspace. It is a significant metaphor that Scott and Lisey never had children. Instead, their coupling allowed him to produce numerous novels that thrilled readers. His bestselling works are filled with raw emotion. Academic vultures circle the widow, desperate for access to Scott’s massive archive of unpublished works, notes and secrets. And some of those secrets are worth killing for. Only Lisey knows the source of Scott’s magic, the place where imagination runs wild, the place called Boo’Ya Moon. Scott and Lisey shared a life full of passion, but his death has left a void in her life. She is adrift, confused and stalked by supernatural forces. Incunks prowl, while Lisey chases bools and ducks blood-bools. Sometimes it is unclear where her reality stops and her imagination takes over. Battling against Scott’s legacy, Lisey also comes face to face with her own demons at the edge of Boo’Ya Moon. King is surprisingly introspective and mature here. He showcases the agony and the ecstasy of the writing process. Where Misery (1987) looked at the relationship between writer and fan, this time it is that of the writer and his one true love. There seems to be much of King in the character of Scott (although Scott is both a Pulitzer- and National Book Award-winner). Pain and suffering are Scott’s literary trademarks. The Buddha taught that the end of suffering is supreme happiness. When King finally reveals Lisey’s fate, we all reach the same destination in Boo’Ya Moon. One of King’s finest works.

Sounds a bit different for King. Kind of intrigued.

After flight delays, mechanical malfunctions, high winds in the DC area and lost luggage at Dulles, I am back in Maryland. California was warm and lovely. Met neighbors and chatted with the real estate agent who found us our new California home (love the agent and the house). Painted, painted and painted.

The former owner of our new house kept it in great shape. My only problem was with her color choices. Bright orange (now a soothing shade called sandstone), scarlet red (now Restoration Hardware green or whatever Behr calls its Restoration Hardware green), bright purple (that one stayed…for now) and lime green (that one was too hard to even tackle, so I’m saving the re-do until we actually get there in November – unfortunately, the lime green is the color of my bedroom, so it I can’t ignore it forever) – yeah, point is none of those colors would have been my first choice. Or even my 80th choice. Happily, most of the overly bright colors, totally-not-me colors are gone, curtains are up, some necessities are sitting on closet shelves and the sprinkler system…well, still trying to figure that one out.

The good news: There are about 200 bookstores within 15 minutes of my new house.

Even better news: All have copies of When Good Things Happen To Bad Boys and Viva Las Bad Boys!

Best news: On the last night of my trip I went to a B&N about 5 miles from my house. Viva Las Bad Boys! was face out on the middle shelf and a lady was buying it. To be totally honest, she picked it up and read the back and then walked off with it. I’m assuming a sale. Fought the temptation to follow her around the store since I’m not clear on California’s legal definition of stalking. Will work that one out later. But, I did squeal with joy.

Face out (a placement someone other than me gave it) and a sale (an educated guess)!!! I’m going to love San Diego…